“I just wish I could shut my brain off sometimes.” I said, sobbing in a therapy session as I recounted the recent times I had been so terrified of something, I became incapacitated.
I wanted more for myself than a longing to live in solitude, and I felt like the key was to stop overthinking every-little-thing.
My Aunt, knowing my recent struggles, pointed me toward Eckhart Tolle’s teachings and I became immersed in YouTube clips of his talks. In a matter of days, my thinking changed. I added his book, The Power of Now, to my Christmas list and Hubby came through-knowing how badly I needed a new lease on life.
Everything changed. Everything got brighter. Because through his teachings, I’ve learned that the past is truly insignificant and it’s no longer apart of me. I’ve learned that my constant concern for what other’s think of me is irrelevant, and just a product of society’s impact on my life. I’ve learned that worry for the future is just a silly projection in my mind, and has no place in the present moment. I’ve learned to be less afraid of being awkward. I’ve learned how to better communicate with my husband. I’ve learned how to let go of things. I’ve learned how to access the love in my heart and let that run my life, instead of my mind. I’ve learned to let go of my judgements on others. I’ve learned to better enjoy my days. I’ve learned how to be a better follower of Christ.
Guys. I spent 24 years dwelling on the past. 24 years feeling like I was still that defiant child, that bad friend, that chubby bikini wearer, that girl that was obsessed with boys, that unreliable person, that high school nobody.
And every time I thought about the past in that way, I gave power to moments LONG gone. I let the past rule over me and hold me back from a free life. My ego relied on those memories and self judgements, and told me they were my identity-all I would ever amount to be.
But nothing could be more wrong.
I’m defined by something much deeper: my soul. And you know what my soul is? It’s the Holy Spirit living within me.
Beneath the confines of my mind is love and light. That is how I want to live-without restriction from the past, the future, or others.
And that’s all I need to be. Because that’s all I need to be, I am free.
I don’t do affiliate links and I’m not trying to get ya’ll to spend your money, but consider listening to Eckhart Tolle on YouTube and maybe buying his book, The Power of Now. Amazon’s got it used for $6 and that’s a small price to pay for a tool to free you from misery. And if you do decide to try it out, get in touch! I’d love to hear your thoughts and discuss the takeaway!